Finishing is better
than starting. Patience is better than pride. Don’t be quick tempered, for anger is the
friend of fools. Proverbs 17:14
I was thinking this week about interpersonal relationships
and the people that I am drawn to and those I prefer to reject. Even though as Christians we want to be good,
kind and nice to everyone there are just people that we won’t like and it can
be very hard to get past.
We all have someone in our lives who is flighty. Maybe they don’t pay attention to detail, or
they never have a plan, or they are very immature and live in a fantasy world. I’m a planner… about everything. I know where I’ll go for vacation in 2019, I
know what we are eating for dinner every day next week and I know where I want
to be 1 year from now, 5 years from now, and 10 years from now. I always have a plan B – but I like to
clearly identify my path, who I am walking with and what I am walking
toward.
The flighty person in my life has ideas but never
plans. She might want to write a book,
but she won’t take the time to plan what it is she wants to write about or when
she wants to start, or a goal to do a certain amount every day. She might want to start her own business, but
she won’t research the costs, or the legal rules, just the fun and interesting
things. Because she doesn’t ever take
the time to plan, she often fails… and then blames the universe instead of
learning from the mistake or taking personal accountability. Because I’m a planner this behavior is
exhausting for me and I often feel frustrated when I’m exposed to this
person. These things that I don’t like
and don’t respect draw me away from them.
In our day to day lives that would be fine. We meet someone,
find out that we can’t overcome our differences and we go our separate ways…
but it doesn’t always work that way. What if the person we don’t like is our boss? A sibling?
An in-law? What if we feel forced
to tolerate and interact with that person because of their relationship in our
lives?
I historically have used avoidance. I’ve tried anger management. I’ve tried to remember that patience is
better than pride but it isn’t always easy and it doesn’t make me feel like a
good person, it still makes me feel frustrated and that’s part of being
human. Even when I desire strongest to
do the right thing, I must remember that there are benefits to all of these
approaches and there isn’t always one right approach. And sadly, there are times when I will have
to eliminate a relationship in my life because it is just too frustrating, or
too disruptive. As we are moving away
from those relationships we may need to mourn them, or talk about them, or feel
compelled to stand our ground because we know that walking away is the only way
we can maintain our emotional and personal wellness, even when it doesn’t feel
like the kind, Christian thing to do.
Prayer: Creator God,
help us to be patient with all the different personalities in our lives. Help us to control our emotions and our
tongues, there are things that we cannot take back. Help me as I deal with the frustrations of
being a human and of managing relationships and dissolving those that are not
healthy in my life.
Christi Moock
No comments:
Post a Comment