Family

So, what is family? When I looked up family, this definition came to the forefront.

“A family is increasingly recognized as a chosen group offering love, support and belonging including extended or chosen friends”.

Continuing my search, I found other definitions, but I paused and began to look at myself. A little over a year ago, my last remaining sister slept away to God. This left me the last of 11 siblings. Since I had been the youngest, I had never been without all or some of them in my life. Sadly, I had my spouse for less than a month after that as he also went to join the Lord.

My daughters surrounded me with love but I felt very alone. But was I alone? As I mourned, friends from many places reached out to me. A friend I have known since 5th grade texted me daily to give support. (She, by the way, is blind and has been a widow for 19 years). Another friend from 7th grade called to tell me to smile and cry whenever I wanted. This friend is deaf and lives alone on a farm and has been widowed for 5 years. Both concluded with “Trust in the Lord”.

Coffee and special friends didn’t say “let me know if you need something", they came to visit, brought food and encouraged me. I was invited to go places; they brought me food and encouraged me. Friends in church service handed me Kleenex when I wept, others took me to lunch and coffee friends went to doctor appointments and took me to movies with them.

God has also blessed me with daughters and grandchildren who visit me, encourage me, and listen but also tease and listen to me. New friends at church and old friends from different groups talk about the future, likes and dislikes and treat me like I am still alive and part of the living world.

Yes, I have lost my extended family, my long-time love and best friend, but I am alive in God's world. My daughters have had me join them for the winter and I realize how much God has blessed me. Family, it seems, does have many meanings but love underrides all of them. God, help me to be family to others when I am needed.

I agree with Michael J. Fox who feels family is not an important thing, it is everything.

Carolyn Olsen