Loving Others

If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.  And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Luke 6: 32-35


This is one of the hardest verses for me to serve in life. I feel like I could count the people that I dislike or consider to be enemies on one hand. Maybe 5 people that I dislike is a lot, or maybe it isn’t very many. It is hard to live the life mentioned in this verse loving our enemies and doing good to them when we are angry with them, or distrusting of them, or simply disgusted by their personalities.

As part of the human condition, it is easy to want to be rewarded for the good things that we do. We study hard and are rewarded with good grades. We perform well at work and receive promotions, and raises. We volunteer at church and in our community and someone tells us thank you. All of these are times that we give and it is rewarded. A positive reinforcement for our positive actions.

There are also times when we receive negative reinforcement for a positive action, which can certainly create confusion. We have all had that individual in our lives, we give and give but they only focus on what they didn’t get. It can be hard to keep giving and easy for us to throw in the towel.

What about people we have already made a decision about not liking? They may have angered us, intentionally or unintentionally. We may have missed an opportunity to have a conversation because we were SO angry in the moment that we simply abandoned the person or situation and now we have regret. We don’t know how to bring up a hurt that is so old, and has festered for so long, that it might not even be relevant anymore. But we have held on for so long to this person as an enemy, we have blocked any other kind of relationship. 

I wonder a lot about these enemy scenarios. How I can love someone I don’t like?  How I can be falsely nice to them and if that is better or worse than treating them as an enemy? In some of these situations I have tried the kitschy approach – Let Go and Let God. But I see the person again, and they ruffle my feathers again, and I don’t want to let go. I want to be annoyed by them, and justify my attitude towards them, and paint them as a villain. Even though I know it isn’t the Christian thing to do. So I go back the drawing board and again they treat me poorly, or I perceive that they treat me poorly because I admittedly expect the worst of them and we are right back in the cycle. I know I can’t be alone. I know it doesn’t make God love me any less and I know that he forgives me for harboring these feelings. But they feel pretty bad, and they really don’t feel like the person I want to be. 

It’s verses like this from Luke that remind me that God has seen much worse and has better expectations of me. He knows that when my feelings are hurt I might start with anger, but he expects me to get to a better place, of forgiveness. Now I just have to do the work! 

Prayer: God who knows and sees all things, help me to get to a place of resolution with my enemies. In moments where I want to see the bad help me to remember the good. In moments that I am angry, please temper my emotions.  Please help me to share my gifts with all of your children, not just the ones I like!     

Christi Moock